Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
