i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
