Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
