: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Randomize
