so explain again why im purple
no
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
