weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
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