Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
