I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
