Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize
