he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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