its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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