this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
