Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
