this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
