I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
