i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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