some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
