So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I am available for nakedness
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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