I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
