are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
