people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Randomize