So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
