You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
