now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
