gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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