69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Randomize
