So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
