when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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