Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
