girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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