I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
