So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Mom said you looked used
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I think my moral compass just broke
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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