My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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