This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Randomize