More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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