writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
