How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
