all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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