haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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