it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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