thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
