Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
