At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
3pm strippers are depressing
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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