ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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