if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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