My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
