That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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