I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
