Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Randomize