she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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