JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
